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Dog Quotes, Puppy Quotes

Puppy Quotes

Happiness is a warm puppy. Charles M. Schulz

Whoever said you can’t buy happiness forgot little puppies. Gene Hill

If there are no dogs in heaven, then I want to go where they went. Will Rogers
The best way to get a puppy is to beg for a baby brother – and they’ll settle for a puppy every time. Winston Pendelton
It’s impossible to keep a straight face in the presence of one or more puppies. Unknown

When a puppy wags its tail and barks at the same time, how do you know which end to believe? Anonymous

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. Ben Williams

A puppy is but a dog, plus high spirits, and minus common sense. Agnes Repplier

If it wasn’t for puppies, some people would never go for a walk. Anonymous

Buy a pup and your money will buy love unflinching. Rudyard Kipling


Dog Quotes

A dog is one of the few remaining reasons why some people can be persuaded to go for a walk. Orlando A. Battista

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself. Josh Billings

A barking dog is often more useful than a sleeping lion. Washington Irving

If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of the fun out of owning one. Andy Rooney

My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dog already thinks I am. Unknown

The dog is a yes-animal, very popular with people who can’t afford to keep a yes-man. Robertson Davies

Dogs laugh, but they laugh with their tails. Max Eastman

Dogs are miracles with paws. Attributed to Susan Ariel Rainbow Kennedy

I like driving around with my two dogs, especially on the freeways. I make them wear little hats so I can use the car-pool lanes. Monica Piper

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog. Ambrose Bierce

Anybody who doesn’t know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. Franklin P. Jones

One reason a dog can be such a comfort when you’re feeling blue is that he doesn’t try to find out why. Unknown

Scratch a dog and you’ll find a permanent job. Franklin P. Jones

A dog is not “almost human” and I know of no greater insult to the canine race than to describe it as such. John Holmes

Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. Roger Caras

No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does. Christopher Morley

If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater, suggest that he wear a tail. Andy Rooney

If you can look at a dog and not feel vicarious excitement and affection, you must be a cat. Author Unknown

If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience. Woodrow Wilson

If dogs could talk, perhaps we’d find it just as hard to get along with them as we do people Karel Caprek

Asking a writer what he thinks about criticism is like asking a lamppost what it feels about dogs. John Osborne

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man Mark Twain

The more I see of the representatives of the people the more I admire my dogs. Alphonse de Lamartine

If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in. Mark Twain

A cat, after being scolded, goes about its business. A dog slinks off into a corner and pretends to be doing a serious self-reappraisal. Robert Brault

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. Ogden Nash

A dog can express more with his tail in seconds than his owner can express with his tongue in hours. Unknown

Man is a dog’s idea of what God should be. Holbrook Jackson

My goal in life is to become as wonderful as my dog thinks I am. Toby Green

If you think dogs can’t count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then giving Fido only two of them. Phil Pastoret

Asking a writer what he thinks about criticism is like asking a lamppost what it feels about dogs. John Osborne

Dogs are animals that poop in public and you’re supposed to pick it up. After a week of doing this, you’ve got to ask yourself, “Who’s the real master in this relationship?” Anthony Griffin

Arnold was a dog’s dog. Whenever he shuffled along walks and through alleyways, he always gave the impression of being on to something big. Martha Grimes

I always pet a dog with my left hand because if he bit me I’d still have my right hand to paint with. Juan Gris

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. Robert Benchley

A dog wags its tail with its heart. Martin Buxbaum

A house without either a cat or a dog is the house of a scoundrel. Portuguese Proverb

All knowledge, the totality of all questions and all answers is contained in the dog. Franz Kafka

America is a large friendly dog in a small room. Every time it wags its tail it knocks over a chair. Arnold Joseph Toynbee

Anybody who doesn’t know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. Franklin P. Jones

Both humans and dogs love to play well into adulthood, and individuals from both species occasionally display evidence of having a conscience. Jon Winokur

Bulldogs are adorable, with faces like toads that have been sat on. Colette

Children are for people who can’t have dogs. Unknown

Dachshund: A half-a-dog high and a dog-and-a-half long. Henry Louis Mencken

Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are already stretched and pulled to such a length that the child cannot do much harm one way or the other. Robert Benchley

Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog’s face he gets mad at you? But when you take him in a car he stick his head out the window? Steve Bluestone

Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in?  I think that is how dogs spend their lives. Sue Murphy

Diplomacy is the art of saying “Nice doggie” until you can find a rock. Will Rogers

Dogs’ lives are too short.  Their only fault, really. Agnes Sligh Turnbull

Dogs, the foremost snobs in creation, are quick to notice the difference between a well-clad and a disreputable stranger. Albert Payson Terhune

Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear. Dave Barry

Dogs have given us their absolute all.  We are the center of their universe.  We are the focus of their love and faith and trust.  They serve us in return for scraps.  It is without a doubt the best deal man has ever made. Roger Caras

Dogs have so many friends because they wag their tails, not their tongues. Proverb

Even the tiniest Poodle or Chihuahua is still a wolf at heart. Dorothy Hinshaw Patent

Every dog has his day. Miguel de Cervantes

Extraordinary creature. So close a friend, yet so remote. Thomas Mann

From a dog’s point of view his master is an elongated and abnormally cunning dog. Mabel L. Robinson

He’s fair. He treats us all the same – like dogs. Henry Jordan

Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in. Mark Twain

He has every attribute of a dog except loyalty. Thomas P. Gore

He that lieth down with dogs, shall rise up with fleas. Benjamin Franklin

Histories are more full of examples of the fidelity of dogs than of friends. Alexander Pope

I’ve seen a look in dogs’ eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts. John Steinbeck

I always like a dog so long as he isn’t spelled backward. G.K. Chesterton

I have found that when you are deeply troubled, there are things you get from the silent devoted companionship of a dog that you can get from no other source. Doris Day

If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons. James Thurber

If dogs talked, one of them would be president by now. Everybody likes dogs. Dean Koontz

If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around. Will Rogers

If your dog is fat, you aren’t getting enough exercise. Unknown

If you want sex, have an affair. If you want a relationship, buy a dog. Julia Burchill

If you would invest in a friendship, purchase a dog. Le Baron Cooke

I like a bit of mongrel myself, whether it’s a man or a dog; they’re the best for everyday. George Bernard Shaw

I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. Winston Churchill

I love a dog.  He does nothing for political reasons. Will Rogers

In the world which we know, among the different and primitive geniuses that preside over the evolution of the several species, there exists not one, excepting that of the dog, that ever gave a thought to the presence of man. Maurice Maeterlinck

In order to really enjoy a dog, one doesn’t merely try to train him to be semi human.  The point of it is to open oneself to the possibility of becoming partly a dog. Edward Hoagland

It’s funny how dogs and cats know the inside of folks better than other folks do, isn’t it? Eleanor H. Porter

I think dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love. For me they are the role model for being alive. Gilda Radner

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. Rita Rudner

I wonder what goes through his mind when he sees us peeing in his water bowl. Penny Ward Moser

Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman. Then if you can get the dog to go somewhere and read the book, I might have a little fun! Groucho Marx

Let dogs delight to bark and bite, For God hath made them so. Isaac Watts

Life is a series of dogs. George Carlin

Life is like a dog sled team.  If you ain’t the lead dog, the scenery never changes. Lewis Grizzard

Living with a dog is messy – like living with an idealist. Henry Louis Mencken

Love me, love my dog. Proverb

Money will buy you a pretty good dog, but it won’t buy the wag of his tail. Josh Billings

My dog is usually pleased with what I do, because she’s not infected with the concept of what I should be doing. Lonzo Idolswine

My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to 99 cents a can.  That’s almost $7.00 in dog money. Joe Weinstein

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can’t decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. Rita Rudner

My little dog, a heartbeat at my feet. Edith Wharton

Newfoundland dogs are good to save children from drowning, but you must have a pond of water handy and a child, or else there will be no profit in boarding a Newfoundland. Josh Billings

Never stand between a dog and the hydrant. John Peers

No man can be condemned for owning a dog. As long as he has a dog, he has a friend; and the poorer he gets, the better friend he has. Will Rogers

No matter how little money and how few possessions you own, having a dog makes you rich. Louis Sabin.

No matter what you’ve done wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did it. Unknown

On the Internet, nobody knows you’re a dog. Cartoon by Peter Steiner

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. Phyllis Diller

Our dogs will love and admire the meanest of us, and feed our colossal vanity with their uncritical homage. Agnes Repplier

Properly trained, a man can be dog’s best friend. Corey Ford

Puppies are nature’s remedy for feeling unloved, plus numerous other ailments of life. Richard Allan Palm

Rambunctious and delinquent dogs become angelic when sitting. Dr. Ian Dunbar

Some days you’re the dog; some days you’re the hydrant. unknown

Some of my best leading men have been dogs and horses. Elizabeth Taylor

Sooner or later we’re all someone’s dog. Terry Pratchett

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. Andy Rooney

The great pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself with him and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool of himself too. Samuel Butler

The dog is mentioned in the Bible eighteen times – the cat not even once. W. E. Farbstein

The dog is the only animal that has seen his god. Author Unknown

The dog wags his tail, not for you, but for your bread. Portuguese Proverb

The dog was created specially for children.  He is the god of frolic. Henry Ward Beecher

The fidelity of a dog is a precious gift. Konrad Lorenz

The greatest love is a mother’s; then a dog’s; then a sweetheart’s. Polish Proverb

The more I see of dogs the less I think of men. Arsene Houssaye

The more I see of man, the more I like dogs. Mme. de Staël

The more one gets to know of men, the more one values dogs. Alphonse Toussenel

The nose of the Bulldog has been slanted backwards so that he can breathe without letting go. Winston Churchill

The pug is living proof that God has a sense of humor. Margo Kaufman

There are three faithful friends – an old wife, an old dog, and ready money. Benjamin Franklin

The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue. Unknown

There is no faith which has never yet been broken, except that of a truly faithful dog. Konrad Lorenz

The world was conquered through the understanding of dogs; the world exists through the understanding of dogs. Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

They are better than human beings, because they know but do not tell. Emily Dickinson

They never talk about themselves but listen to you while you talk about yourself, and keep up an appearance of being interested in the conversation. Jerome K.

To err is human To forgive, canine. Unknown

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. Aldous Huxley

To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring – it was peace. Milan Kundera

We long for an affection altogether ignorant of our faults.  Heaven has accorded this to us in the uncritical canine attachment. George Eliot

What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight – it’s the size of the fight in the dog. Dwight D. Eisenhower

When a dog barks at the moon, then it is religion; but when he barks at strangers, it is patriotism! David Starr Jordan

When a dog bites a man that is not news, but when a man bites a dog that is news. Charles Anderson Dana

When a dog wants to hang out the “Do Not Disturb” sign, as all of us do now and then, he is regarded as a traitor to his species. Ramona C. Albert

When a man’s best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem. Edward Abbey

Whoever loveth me, loveth my hound. Thomas Moore

With the exception of women, there is nothing on earth so agreeable or necessary to the comfort of man as the dog. Edward Jesse, Anecdote of Dogs

You ask of my companions.  Hills, sir, and the sundown, and a dog as large as myself that my father bought me. They are better than human beings, because they know but do not tell. Emily Dickinson

You can say any fool thing to a dog, and the dog will give you this look that says, “My God, you’re right! I never would’ve thought of that! Dave Barry

You think dogs will not be in heaven? I tell you, they will be there long before any of us. Robert Louis Stevenson


 Dog Quotes, Puppy Quotes
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